Thread:Vicki04/@comment-35319541-20180419000507/@comment-35319541-20180419064216

Wow Vicki life is funny is it not. I lost my job in 2012, applied for disability in 2013 after finally admitting to myself I would never be "normal" again and was finally approved in 2015. That was a rough time for me. I had deathly migraines the entire month of May that year and my positional vertigo kicked in and has not left to this day it is always there. I walk like a drunk at times it gets so bad I have had to crawl to the bathroom. The vertigo was tremendous when I was pregnant at 40, yes planned. wanted a daughter,and got her then  6 mo later I was throwing up with her brother.. long story there too. Anyway I am still having memory loss problems, short term recall, repercussions of back surgery and neuro nerve issues in the limbs. The meds were making me worse and worse until after 3 years I could think enough to cold turkey them. Went back to the dr after  months and he said "wow Viki I don't know what you are doing but keep it up you look so much better-get this he kept mixing my 56 year old self up with my 74 year old aunt who had to accompany me- I said " I quit taking your d... drugs. Then found another dr who understands I will never take meds again.

Cant hold my granddaught cause she's 21 lbs, can't stand for more than 15 min due to the pain in lower back and legs. Working days are done. This SN game seems to have helped trigger some brain activitity cause I surprise myself by remembering something all the sudden, like where did I put that thing...oh yeah, there it is!! lol. But friends here have been a great pick me up too. May my kids never walk my path, if you know what I mean.

I am so gla.. d you had the insight to get the help you needed when you did and sorry that it had to come to that. I keep telling myself that I am too important to let myself end things. I matter to me. Sure I hurt 24/7 but hey at least I AM. We have to stay strong for ourselves and not let others destroy us. even if they are blood. Sorry for the mistakes, it would take me longer to fix em than leave em. I really am, or used to be quite intelligent (man I need auto spell). So nice to share with someone so sweet. Basically, I am not this much of a jabber jaw. If we could meet and share stories oh me oh my! lola