Thread:Llyssa1020/@comment-37437697-20190827034838/@comment-38558458-20190829073556

Dear Mirage  ~  You my sweet friend speak more than just whale...you are also a cat whisperer. Your last post was so warm and sweet, that it moved me to tears reading it. I was with my parents today and asked about Sasha. It sounds like she has stuck pretty close to my father and I think they both need each other. I've also been close to my two girls the past two days. They probably don't know exactly why, but they have definitely loved all of the attention.

I'm so sorry you were not able to be there for your little Yoyo. That would be so hard as well. My parents had one other cat (back in 2007) and Tiggie wasn't doing well right before we were to go on vacation. We had a trip to Alaska planned and my sister was going to look in on the 3 cats for about a week and then her and her family were going to join us on the cruise portion of the trip. Another family friend was going to check in on the cats for the week we were all gone. We were not sure if she would make it in time for when we returned, so my Mom asked my sister to take her in and have her put to sleep. It was a difficult decision and we were solemn on the flight up to Anchorage, but we were so caught up in the excitement of our trip that it didn't seem as real because we were gone. When we came home, we realized she was no longer there, but we had so many good memories from our trip, I think it just made it easier for us. It would have been hard to have dealt with when we came back home or to have had someone else make that decision (or put them in the position of finding her). I'm not sure of the effect on Nick and Sasha at the time. They had each other, so I think they adjusted fine. They were around 4 years old and she was a lot older. It was comical to see these spry young cats around this much older and more mature Miss Tiggie - lol. We thought it gave her a few more years.

I'm glad your boys are in good health giving all of their loving care. I would be worried about little Pip too with his Asthma. Do you need to do anything special for him with that type of condition? My little Bella is not as big as Emma and had several bouts with an upper respiratory infection after she was born. I think she was on 4 different types of anti-biotics. It affected her eye on the right (when you look in the pictures). When I took them in around 5 months to be fixed, the Doctor said he needed to cut something that would help her to see better. I don't quite know what he did (she still looked the same afterwards). Anyway, Bella is fearless and doesn't let anything scare her - lol. She is also easier to pick up and kiss on a lot. I try to watch how much I do that because I know that Emma does get jealous. I just can't pick Emma up the same way, so I try to baby her in other ways - lol. Emma is one who will chatter at me. Or if I'm talking to my Mom on the phone, she thinks I'm talking to her (or maybe she thinks I should be talking only to her). I have a goldfinch feeder right outside the window and the girls just love it. They think those are their babies. It's nice when I can have the window open and you hear them pecking at the feeder. We will even get chickadees and a woodpecker every now and then. They got a special brushing from me today and I brushed under their chins and their whiskers and told them it was from you.

I'm hoping Sasha will come out of her shell again. She used to be very close with me but Nick would get very jealous. He would bully her and pin her down and I would have to get after him. It finally got to the point where Sasha would be very nervous if he was around and didn't want to get caught. I spend Wednesday evenings with Mom and we watch TV. We've had the summer off for break, but will be starting up again in a few weeks with our favorite TV show. I'm hoping that Sasha will come around and be upstairs more. She used to sit on the back of my recliner and lick my hair sometimes. I think she was grooming me and letting me know she loved me. She was always preening over her brother - lol.

What state do you live in that has mountains? 3 1/2 hours is not far, but it is not just a hop in the car, drive 60-90 minutes and have a surprise dinner. If you find that you are needing to send her things often (even care packages) you might want to check into Regional Rate Boxes from the USPS. Last year, I put things out on Facebook marketplace to sell and a few limited items on EBay. Every now and then I would get someone who didn't live close by and they would agree to pay for the shipping. The regional rate boxes are just like the Priority Mail boxes, give or take an inch or two in one direction or another. But they are much more affordable. She's probably in your same "Zone" and you should definitely check it out. That will be nice when she comes home in September and the bus service will make that handy. It will go fast and then Thanksgiving will be around the corner. It is all about letting go and supporting. This is a big adjustment for you too and it comes as no surprise that you were hit by it all of a sudden and got emotional. You are an empty nester now. Do you have other children? If not, it can be even more difficult.

My niece just lives across the river in one of the 5 towns that make up the "Quad Cities". So, she can always call on her Mom and Dad and she does (especially for groceries). But there will be times when my sister hasn't heard from her for quite a while. My sister went back to work full time a couple of years ago. She was able to be pretty much a stay at home Mom for most of Josie's schooling. My sister has been so busy with her own job and promotion a few weeks ago, that I don't think she is really hit as emotionally by Josie being gone as much. I also remember that age and I really wanted to be on my own and my parents/grandparents were old people who didn't understand my generation. It took me some growing up before I came back around to realizing everyone just loved me and wanted the best for me. Then I realized they actually could impart some wisdom. I think it will happen like that with Josie as well. One thing I am very thankful for is that she is not boy crazy. She has only dated two boys and the first one she knew from grade school. They decided to be a permanent couple together their freshman year and went to all of the dances and hung out, but I don't think it was anything serious and we felt very very safe with him. He was at the top of his class and received academic advances through high school. They hung out with all of his smart friends. They stopped seeing each other the last half of their senior year. The bad part of all of this now that we have that hindsight is that I think Josie tried comparing herself to the rest of them and never felt like she measured up - that she was good enough. We thought college would be a good break since he went away on a full ride scholarship. Only problem was her next door roommate was friends from that group and the only one that Josie still associated with. So, there was still that tie. New mutual college friends recommended that Josie meet this other boy and they dated maybe 8 months. When she decided not to go back to school, he decided that he preferred a girlfriend who was doing the same thing he was. Which I can understand and it didn’t' surprise me. I think that one hurt her more though. So, she has decided she is going to be like her Aunt Llyssa and stay single for the rest of her life. And that's not a bad idea, except I had a college education and did very well for myself and was not dependent on anyone else. Right now, I think that's the only thing she admires about me - I'm hoping that will change again someday. I have a lot of advice I can give her and could make her journey a little less painful, but I'm afraid she is just going to have to experience some of these knocks of hard life herself. Mom and I were laughing about it today. When she turned 14 years old, all we ever heard about was how she was now eligible to drive a car with her learner’s permit. Then she turned 16 and she didn't have anything to say about it. It wasn't until she was 17, when she really started driving a car. I think it takes her a little longer to be surer of herself. And Jasper will give her some responsibility. So between our pets and our kids, we love them fiercely.

Well time for me to answer a few more messages and head to bed. Thank you so much for your pearls of wisdom. I was quite touched. Thank you Mirage! ~  Llyssa